PAFP Camp get angry at all of my honesty — return to camp

[PEONYPAW]

Peonypaw is crawling back and begging for forgiveness. That's all this is, right?

He feels like his limbs had been stuck in mud; they are a heavy weight that he needs to carry instead of them carrying him. His head hangs low, in both fear and embarrassment, and his eyes are glued to the ground underneath him. How will he be received? Honeyflower and Cometpaw are on either side of him, but he's not sure that it will matter at all. They had convinced him to try again... isn't that cruel? He doesn't even know if Dustystar hates him now or not. She probably does. And yet still, their care had coerced him forward.

He's just not sure if it's worth it, is all.

His chest is all but hollowed out. Only the occasional sniff betrays the hysteria in which he had found himself in just a bit ago—his body is spent, exhausted from the tips of his ears to the end of his tail.

Peonypaw hesitates at the entrance of camp.

Please, he thinks, though he's not sure what exactly he's pleading for.

When he finally enters camp, he is almost surprised to see it the same way he had left it. A few cats are huddled close together, speaking or eating, while others are on their way to attend to their duties. How much more diligent they are than him. His stance still betrays terror and submission, but he now lifts his gaze as he searches for Dustystar.

She's not difficult to find.

Peonypaw drags himself towards her, entirely expectant of her rage. He would certainly deserve it. He looks at her now, with his body pressed close to the ground while she towers above him; his entire future relies on her now. Her forgiveness. Her decision. Her order.

He is at a loss for words, so he says only what he knows to be true.

"I'm sorry."

Takes place a few hours after this thread.
Please wait for @Dustystar !

 

[Dustystar Dustystar]

✪ Align my Heart, my Body, my Mind​

indentAs soon as she sees her apprentice, Dustystar is rushing towards him. She presses her nose against his cheek, checking him over for injuries. "Peonypaw, you're back! Don't run off like that again." Although she scolds him, her voice is breathless with anxiety.

indentThe urge is there, to egg him on with leading questions. "Why would you say something like that? It's not right to tell lies, Peonypaw." Dustystar holds her tongue, for now. While she'd kept the peace in camp, thoughts had crept into her mind. Had Peony caused the fire? He would only have been a pawful of moons old, at the time. Dustystar finds it hard to believe that such a little kitten, lively as he was, could cause such a tragedy.

indentRegardless, guilt and agony are written across the apprentice's face. Something must have happened, Dustystar knows, to have caused such despair. Her mouth does dry.
"Peonypaw... is there something you'd like to talk to me about?"

Dustystar - 27 moons - Windclan Leader

 

[PEONYPAW]

It takes everything from Peonypaw to not recoil from Dustystar's clear display of... concern. Aside from the fact that he scarcely goes for physical contact, it puzzles him to no end. He had expected her to meet him with anger, but even when she scolds him for breaking a rule and running away, there is no real bite to her voice. Not this time. He stands frozen instead, allowing her to soothe him- or soothe herself, whichever she's really going for here.

His gaze drops as she asks him to explain. He had gone into detail with Honeyflower and Cometpaw, but that had not been easy either. There are so many more pairs of eyes on him now. Some of them are no doubt waiting for him to mess up even further, while others may just be looking for something juicy to chew on later into the evening.

Or perhaps Peonypaw is being terribly pessimistic about his Clanmates.

Either way, he doesn't have room to escape this situation. He must come clean now—and it starts with a heavy, shaky exhale.

"It was an accident,"

he starts, voice barely above a whisper. That's just an excuse. Despite his heart picking up once again, Peonypaw rolls his shoulders and stands a little taller—looks Dustystar in the eye, even.

"Petalpaw and I... we are argued. Or I argued with him. He's not to blame for anything."

That last part comes out of him faster than he intends. The last thing he wants is for his brother to suffer the consequences of Peonypaw's own actions.

"I, I... I wasn't looking. I was being stupid. I knocked over those Twoleg-made things, with the little fire inside."

Peonypaw pauses, a shudder passing through him. What a terrible scene it had been- how quickly that "little fire" had spread. It occurs to him now, that the Twolegs are more foolish than he thought; they had built something out of wood and covered its insides with hay, only to put those hazardous lights in the way.

But of course, he had been the stupidest out of them all.

When he looks at Dustystar again, he realizes he really just wants to be forgiven, if it is even possible. He had carried the weight of his mistake for so many moons... had been certain that this is a flaw within himself, but now, as he retells the story with Honeyflower's words ringing in his head, he realizes that he truly had not intended to hurt anybody that night. He had scoffed upon their ideas of community, sure, but... they had been a pleasant enough bunch. None of them had deserved the scorching flames.

"I couldn't do anything to stop the fire then."

Peonypaw says with finality. The air settles around them, and he awaits Dustystar's response—his punishment. Either for having kept this secret for this long, or for having made such a massive mistake- or both at once.