PAFP Camp Is something still scaring you? ☼ // Iciclepaw

[Torrentpaw]

- TORRENTPAW -

Not some average bones, I believe in love!

.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ⟡ Padding around the edge of camp, Torrentpaw's eyes were bright as he sought out a certain fluffy white tom. He couldn't help but notice the tom slink away after the apprentice ceremony, though it wasn't unusual for Iciclepaw to do so.

Picking up in speed as he spotted a flash of white through a couple of reeds, Torrentpaw slowed to a halt before sticking his head through the plants, whiskers twitching as he briskly shook them out of his face. "Found you!" He meowed, before leaping out of the reeds and landing beside the sitting tom. Circling around to his other side, Torrentpaw leaned back onto his haunches as his gaze fell onto the small stream that surrounded their camp below his paws.

Looking back over Iciclepaw, Torrentpaw eyed him thoughtfully for a moment. Of course he had noticed the tom's reaction at the ceremony prior, but he wasn't going to admit it to him. After all, Iciclepaw might not be comfortable sharing his feelings, that was up to him to decide.

"What are you thinking about?" Torrentpaw asked, voice full of friendliness and sincerity as he gazed at the cat he considered to be his friend, despite their lack of conversations.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Throw me in the sky ⟡ you would swear the sun shining‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

• ⟡ OOC -
  Please wait for @Iciclekit to reply first! <3 then anyone can overhear their convo and join in :D
  
•  
• Torrentpaw
  ‎ ‎ He/Him | Riverclan Apprentice
  
  ⟡
  "speech" - text - thoughts
  
  ⟡
  Mentored by Pineheart
  
  ⟡
  A rosetted charcoal Bengal.
  
  ⟡
  Has a sturdy build with a large head and paws, and short thick fur.
  
  ⟡
  Holds a zealous and determined demeanor.
  
  ⟡
  Usually seen with Squid

 

[Iciclepaw Iciclepaw]

SPOOKY

Just close your eyes, the sun is going down... You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now

Spooky was practicing his... well, speech... If you could call it that. Ever since the meeting, he'd been a bundle of nerves, jittery and uncertain. He needed some kind of grounding, even if it only came from himself. So he'd taken to speaking aloud, trying to gather his thoughts into something that made sense. Maybe if he rehearsed, he'd finally feel less like a fish out of water. But then, Torrentpaw had found him. He nearly jumped out of his fur. A startled squeak escaped him as he sprang to his paws, wide-eyed and flustered. " T-Torrentpaw! " he stammered, his tail lashing behind him as he tried to settle the fur rising along his spine.

The moment she asked what he was thinking about, Spooky practically short-circuited.

" W-Well… I was thinking… um… " He shifted his paws, clearly struggling to find the right words. " About… being better? " he finally blurted, voice pitching upward uncertainly. " I mean... Not that I think I'm terrible! Just- uh... I mean.... Thinking about how well everyone else did! And that maybe it'd be amazing if I could, too. "

He glanced at him then, ears slowly drooping as his voice dropped to a whisper. " I just… I don't think I'll ever be as brave as any of you… "

═════════════⊹⊱ ⟡ ⊰⊹═════════════

 

[Torrentpaw]

- TORRENTPAW -

Not some average bones, I believe in love!

.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ⟡ Torrentpaw listened thoughtfully, blinking at him patiently as he went on. He felt his heart leap in sympathy for Iciclepaw, silently wondering why he thought so little of himself. Having Pikestar as a mentor was a huge opportunity, but maybe that was the problem?

I wonder if he feels pressured? Torrentpaw mused, twisting his maw slightly in thought. So much had happened the past few moons, it wouldn't be unusual for anxieties to be high for some cats.

"I just… I don't think I'll ever be as brave as any of you…"

Holding his gaze as Iciclepaw suddenly looked his way, Torrentpaw paused for a moment, before shuffling sideways on his haunches a pawstep closer to the tom.

"What makes you think that you can't?" He asked, tilting his head to the side as he spoke.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Throw me in the sky ⟡ you would swear the sun shining‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

• ⟡ OOC -
  
  
•  
• Torrentpaw
  ‎ ‎ He/Him | Riverclan Apprentice
  
  ⟡
  "speech" - text - thoughts
  
  ⟡
  Mentored by Pineheart
  
  ⟡
  A rosetted charcoal Bengal.
  
  ⟡
  Has a sturdy build with a large head and paws, and short thick fur.
  
  ⟡
  Holds a zealous and determined demeanor.
  
  ⟡
  Usually seen with Squid

 

[Iciclepaw Iciclepaw]

ICICLEPAW

Just close your eyes, the sun is going down... You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now

Iciclepaw stared at Torrentpaw for a long moment, blinking slowly as the other spoke. He hadn't expected to be chosen by Pikestar himself. The leader had been kind, kinder than he'd expected... Ever since he had actually shown himself to the others, when they left the shipyard, but still... He felt small. Insignificant. Like a kit pretending to be an apprentice. He wasn't brave. He wasn't loud. He was... a coward. His ears drooped, blue eyes falling to the ground.

" I-I'm scared... all the time... " he whispered, voice thick with emotion. " I'm not a good swimmer… What if I never will be? What if Pikestar realizes he's wasting his time on me? " His voice cracked, barely louder than a breath. " W-What if...? " He trailed off into a quiet, choked sound, burying his face in the dirt and covering his head with his paws, as if shielding himself from his own thoughts.

But… Russetfall had said he was growing. That he was doing better. He was talking to Torrentpaw, wasn't he? That had to mean something. Right? They were friends… weren't they?

He hoped so. Stars, he really hoped so.

═════════════⊹⊱ ⟡ ⊰⊹═════════════

 

[Torrentpaw]

- TORRENTPAW -

Not some average bones, I believe in love!

.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ⟡ Torrentpaw frowned, guilt tearing away at him as he watched iciclepaw draw his paws over his ears. No cat deserved to feel this way, and Iciclepaw had so much life ahead of him--so many clanmates to support him along the way.

Shaking his head softly, Torrentpaw crouched down next to Iciclepaw and lowered his head next to the tom's, just to make sure he could hear him.

"Lift your head up." Torrentpaw meowed, his voice gentle as kindness laced his tone. He then rose back to a sitting position, waiting for Iciclepaw to do the same.

"You're a Riverclan cat!" He exclaimed, gesturing with his tail towards the camp and it's surroundings. "Which means your clanmates are here to support you, no matter what. You've made it this far from the shipyard, doesn't it feel like so long ago?" Torrentpaw continued, thinking back to the damp and debris-littered 'home.' "That takes courage--courage that you had. You should be proud of that."

Torrentpaw could see the potential inside Iciclepaw, just as he did in everycat. He just needed to continue to be brave enough to let it show.

Lifting his tail, Torrentpaw rested it against Iciclepaw's shoulder, a kind but sure gesture. "What you can do now is enough, you'll only grow stronger from here." It was a promise, one Torrentpaw was confident in.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Throw me in the sky ⟡ you would swear the sun shining‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

• ⟡ OOC -
  
  
•  
• Torrentpaw
  ‎ ‎ He/Him | Riverclan Apprentice
  
  ⟡
  "speech" - text - thoughts
  
  ⟡
  Mentored by Pineheart
  
  ⟡
  A rosetted charcoal Bengal.
  
  ⟡
  Has a sturdy build with a large head and paws, and short thick fur.
  
  ⟡
  Holds a zealous and determined demeanor.
  
  ⟡
  Usually seen with Squid

 

[Iciclepaw Iciclepaw]

SPOOKY

Just close your eyes, the sun is going down... You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now

The request to lift his head came from Torrentpaw, and Iciclepaw hesitated, terrified of what he might see. Disappointment, maybe. Pity. Something that would confirm every fear curled up inside his chest. But… Torrentpaw's voice hadn't sounded disappointed. It had been kind. Gentle. Understanding. Maybe he was too deep in his head. Maybe Torrentpaw didn't think less of him. Maybe… maybe Torrentpaw just wanted him to see what he already saw. Reluctantly, Iciclepaw obeyed. He sat up, though his posture remained hunched, head dipped, shoulders drawn inward, still dwarfed by the other apprentice. His eyes flicked upward, uncertain and glassy, to meet Torrentpaw's.

Torrentpaw. Who said he was a RiverClan cat. Who said they were here for him. That he wasn't alone. The words clawed at something deep inside, something old and fragile. He felt it then, that pressure in his chest. He knew what it was called, but didn't dare say it aloud. They'd made it out of the shipyard. Somehow. It felt like a lifetime ago, but they had. And this was RiverClan. This was home, wasn't it? They were building it. Russetfall was kind. A good mama- N-no, wait-! caretaker. Caretaker!!

A shuddering breath escaped him as he swiped a paw across his face, trying to catch the tears before they spilled fully. But it was too late. " I... I... " he started, voice trembling. Then, barely louder than a whisper. " I am enough... j-just as I am? " His eyes, wide and wet, searched Torrentpaw's face for the answer. Hoping, aching... For it to be true.

═════════════⊹⊱ ⟡ ⊰⊹═════════════

 

[Torrentpaw]

- TORRENTPAW -

Not some average bones, I believe in love!

.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ⟡ Torrentpaw held his gaze as the tom looked up, ears lowering slightly at the sight. He waited for Iciclepaw to get his words out as he watched, patience in his eyes.

Once Iciclepaw had finally uttered the words, those that Torrentpaw urged him to realize, his eyes flashed with happiness.

"Without a doubt!" He exclaimed, lifting a paw to swiftly swipe away the tears from one of Iciclepaw's eyes. "It's about time you realized." Torrentpaw purred, hoping his lightheartedness would lighten Iciclepaw's mood.

"Have trust in Pikestar, too." He continued, his voice growing more sincere. "He chose you as his apprentice to teach and guide you, not to judge you based on what you can and can't do already." Torrentpaw settled down onto his side, dipping a paw into the stream before them, sending ripples out into the water.

"The first time I tried to fish here, I fell straight into the stream!" Torrentpaw mused, a short laugh escaping him. "And Pineheart had to haul me out as if I was a kit." His whiskers twitched in amusement at the memory. "No one gets everything right the first time, have patience with yourself." Torrentpaw added, looking back towards Iciclepaw with an encouraging gaze.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ You can't change me ⟡ You can't hide me‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

• ⟡ OOC -
  
  
•  
• Torrentpaw
  ‎ ‎ He/Him | Riverclan Apprentice
  
  ⟡
  "speech" - text - thoughts
  
  ⟡
  Mentored by Pineheart
  
  ⟡
  A rosetted charcoal Bengal.
  
  ⟡
  Has a sturdy build with a large head and paws, and short thick fur.
  
  ⟡
  Holds a zealous and determined demeanor.
  
  ⟡
  Usually seen with Squid

 

[Iciclepaw Iciclepaw]

ICICLEPAW

Just close your eyes, the sun is going down... You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now

It was such a hard concept for him to grasp, was he really enough? Just as he was? But he hadn't done anything remarkable to be enough! He hadn't helped as much as the others... And he wasn't very brave. He was clumsy, often fled or flinched away, and panicked whenever he thought he was failing everyone... Maybe he wasn't cut out to be a warrior at all... Well, technically, he wasn't a warrior yet... He was just an apprentice! B-but still...

A soft breath escaped him as he looked up at Torrentpaw, noticing the happy smile on his friend's face. He realized he didn't want to make Torrentpaw feel bad. " O-okay... " he stammered, sniffling as Torrentpaw gently wiped away some stray tears.

And Pikestar... Pikestar was kind. If their leader had chosen him, then maybe... Just maybe.... They saw something in him that he didn't. Yeah, like how- no, no, he wasn't going to be mean to himself! Drawing in a sharp breath, he tried to stand a little taller, listening as Torrentpaw shared how he had struggled to fish at this very spot and had fallen into the river. And that Pineheart had to pull him out. Iciclepaw's eyes widened in surprise, no way! He could hardly imagine Torrentpaw making mistakes, but...

Maybe they were all learning. Even the older, more experienced cats. Could that really be true? Did he really just have to be patient with himself...?

Swallowing hard, he stepped closer to Torrentpaw and peered down at the water. " W-when we first... you know... traveled here, nobody really noticed me... " He trailed off, looking sheepish. " I tried swimming all on my own... Someone ended up helping me in the end, b-but... I managed some of it by myself...! " he uttered, remembering the journey they made from the shipyard to the place now called RiverClan.

═════════════⊹⊱ ⟡ ⊰⊹═════════════