Camp the worst is yet to come — meadowpaw

This thread takes place inside the clan's camp.

BENGT

WIPE THE SYSTEM
Loner/Rogue
21
4
Freshkill
115
Pronouns
HE/HIM
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Played by
KARMEN
A sneeze rouses him from his sleep, forcing Bengt to roll from his flank and onto his belly as he returns to the world.

It's been a few days since his arrival, and his time here has been extremely eventful, even though he had been slipping in and out of consciousness. During the hours when he had been awake enough to actually operate his senses, he's learned a few things: he is in the WindClan camp, more specifically the medicine cat's den, and his savior is called Meadowpaw. He had taken note of the few visitors that came and gone for their own set of problems. Even if he has been brought here to be kept alive, Bengt has spent enough time on his own to remember cautiousness. In his mind, he has mapped out the camp as much as he can, just in case he needs to make a swift escape.

So far it's been quite comfortable here. Food is brought to him, fresh and delicious at his paws, and he rejoices in not having to catch—or steal—his own prey for once. The large blind spot on the left side of his face still gives him nausea if he thinks about it too much... so he prefers not to think about it at all. Even the initially sharp scents of the many herbs that Meadowpaw has been using on him with his suggestions and help have become something familiar to his nose; it isn't nearly as distracting anymore.

Bengt tears into the newly deposited mouse. He is positively ravenous now that his pain levels are more manageable and he is able to keep the food down. His ears twitch when he hears Meadowpaw shuffle about on the side, the side that he doesn't see anymore without turning his head, and he addresses her between bites without looking.
"I've made myself quite permanent in your living space, huh?"
Humor returns to him bit by bit. The smirk on his face is audible.
"Regret it yet?"
He's been poking at her to cull his boredom, curious to know what she's like under all that selflessness and goodness. It'd be annoying if those very same qualities had not been the thing that saved him.

 
MEADOWPAW
x


Her ears perked at the rustle of movement, and she glanced toward the nest where Bengt was shifting upright. Watching him more alert, moving on his own again—it eased one of the many weights bearing down on her shoulders. Those first days after bringing him in had been tense. The risk of infection was high, and he'd been in so much pain. She'd done her best, keeping him comfortable with poppy seeds and insisting on rest, but still, she'd feared it wouldn't be enough.

She turned back to her work, at least until he spoke. "Not at all." A smile twitches on her muzzle. "You might take up half the den, but if I run out of space, I'll just use you for storage." A soft giggle escaped her. She cast a glance over, catching the telltale curve of his smirk even if he wasn't looking directly at her. He was a lot nicer than she would've thought. A bit mischievious, but that wasn't a bad thing. Just because he wasn't from their clan didn't make him a threat by default. There were good cats out there too. He seemed more than 'good' enough to her.

"But really though, " She added with a bit more sincerity. "Bringing you here isn't something I could regret." She met his gaze—his good eye, at least—soft concern peeking through. To think not even a few sunrises ago, he was bleeding out in the moor.

xI BELIEVE THAT THERES COURAGEBUT ITS BURNIN' LIKE ASH IN THE WINDx
WINDCLAN MEDICINE CAT APPRENTICE 10 MOONS SHE/HER
Meadowpaw values kindness and remembrance. As a kit, she internalized her mother's lessons, but questioned whether her way is the only way. She has broken free from the heavy burden of her mother's expectations due to their estrangement after the fire. She remains kind and soft-spoken through all she's endured, but is not afraid to speak out for what she believes is right.

Meadow works tirelessly at any task she undertakes, desperate to prove herself capable and worthy despite her disability. Without her mother's guidance, she finds new ways to express herself.

In conversations, she is gentle, thoughtful, and withdrawn, often hiding her struggles, fearing others seeing her as incapable. She continues to have a strong bond not only with her sister, but with her adopted family as well. Meadow uses her new freedom to support and deepen the bonds with her clanmates. Additionally, she has started to explore the more spiritual side of herself…

Her worldview is a complicated mix of hope and frustration. She wants to believe that there's hope at the end of all the suffering, but feels trapped by her limitations. With enough time and support, she may find a way to overcome her limitations and accept herself.
 
Bengt passes his tongue over his muzzle when he's finished, and promptly rolls to the side a little, laying lopsided as Meadowpaw addresses her. He flicks his head towards his flank, as if to make a point.
"You're in luck then, 'cause there's plenty of space here. Maybe you can decorate my fur with leaves and berries. I could be your portable medicine storage."
A pause.
"Portable, once you let me stretch my legs a little."
He fakes dissatisfaction, but he knows that the limitations Meadowpaw has set for him are for his own good. He isn't about to go against those—when has he ever been anything other than self-serving?

Her voice turns honey-sweet then, and Bengt feels caught up in it. As always, Meadowpaw's sincerity is on full display. He wonders if she is even capable of lying or otherwise pretending.

Bengt decides not to combat it with humor this time. He still cannot wrap his head around the events of the past few days fully, but he supposes he can try to get clear answers instead of deflecting and changing the subject.
"You've put an awful lot of trust in me,"
he points out, searching Meadowpaw's face for anything that may be hidden from view.
"I could've been dangerous to your Clan. To you. But you still healed me without knowing me."
Bengt knows himself quite well, or so he thinks. He understands the depths of his pride and wrath; knows how far he could go for his own self-indulgence; fully controls his claws and teeth when push comes to shove. Meadowpaw doesn't know any of that.
"Why?"
 
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MEADOWPAW
x


"Medicine storages don't usually move, but that would be funny." She was sure he was tired of being cooped up for so long. Still, if she gave in and he ended up reopening his wounds, he'd be coming right back. Better to be safe than sorry.

The apprentice blinked softly, soaking in his words like a thirsty plant might drink rain. He was right. He could have been dangerous. Back when she'd found him, that risk hadn't crossed her mind the way it should've. The idea of someone dying because she couldn't save them had frightened her far more than any warning about strangers mama had ever hissed into her ear.

"That's true." She murmured, glancing back toward the herbs she'd been sorting. Some sat neatly organized in pristine little piles. Others… not so much. A few herbs were still jumbled, waiting to be separated. "I'm not naive enough to think cats like that don't exist. I haven't met many, but I know they're out there."

She hadn't forgotten what happened to Dustystar. Or the look on that toms face after he'd killed his leader. Meadowpaw didn't think he had done it out of cruelty… desperation maybe, but not cruelty. Even so, that didn't change the fact that he'd done it. "You could've hurt me or someone I care about. But I could've just as easily hurt you. My clanmates could've, too, if they'd wanted to." Her soft green eyes drift back to Bengt. "You took just as much a risk as I did coming here."

Even cats she loved were capable of hurting her, but she'd chance it anyway. Mama could be cruel and hateful. Sometimes her words cut worse than her claws, but even buried, Meadowpaw knew there was still love in there. Hiding somewhere, even if it was hard to find anymore.

Could be that cats like Merrystalk were the smart ones. Maybe she should have been more cautious, more closed off from the world to preserve what she already held dear. It would've been safer to push the rest of the world away because of what might happen.

But... she couldn't do that. That wasn't who she was now, and it wasn't someone she wanted to be either. After the gathering, that was a tempting thought. Witnessing so much cruelty in one place was frightening, but at the same time, wasn't that all the more reason to be kind? "I don't want to be the kind of cat who hurts others, even out of fear. Just because others can be cruel, doesn't mean I have to be." Her paws fumbled distractedly with the herbs, half-heartedly nudging the mixed ones into their proper piles.

Someday Meadowpaw knew she might regret it, but right now she'd still rather take the risk. Deadwood could've hurt her when they met, but he hadn't. He was in the place where cats who did horrible things ended up… and yet he had been kind. Gentle, even. The same could be true for Bengt. He looked more than capable of doing harm, but there was more to him than met the eye.

xI BELIEVE THAT THERES COURAGEBUT ITS BURNIN' LIKE ASH IN THE WINDx
WINDCLAN MEDICINE CAT APPRENTICE 10 MOONS SHE/HER
Meadowpaw values kindness and remembrance. As a kit, she internalized her mother's lessons, but questioned whether her way is the only way. She has broken free from the heavy burden of her mother's expectations due to their estrangement after the fire. She remains kind and soft-spoken through all she's endured, but is not afraid to speak out for what she believes is right.

Meadow works tirelessly at any task she undertakes, desperate to prove herself capable and worthy despite her disability. Without her mother's guidance, she finds new ways to express herself.

In conversations, she is gentle, thoughtful, and withdrawn, often hiding her struggles, fearing others seeing her as incapable. She continues to have a strong bond not only with her sister, but with her adopted family as well. Meadow uses her new freedom to support and deepen the bonds with her clanmates. Additionally, she has started to explore the more spiritual side of herself…

Her worldview is a complicated mix of hope and frustration. She wants to believe that there's hope at the end of all the suffering, but feels trapped by her limitations. With enough time and support, she may find a way to overcome her limitations and accept herself.