TW: Sensitive Content then you better start selling this / birth

[Palefern]

PALEFERN, 30 moons / thunderclan queen
A lithe pale cream tabby with unusual blue and green eyes.
Ex-mate to EMBER, sister to DAWNSONG
Palefern is deaf and uses her own version of kitty sign language to communicate primarily, though she will speak on occasion (speech is often slurred due to hearing loss)
Tagging SERPENTBERRY; HOPEKIT, HEARTKIT

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trigger warning This thread contains descriptions of childbirth, postpartum depression, parental separation, and grief. Reader discretion is advised.

Nobody had warned her about the contractions. To be fair, nobody had ever sat Fro- Palefern down and explained how pregnancy would work, either. Even if more readily accepted, the way Palefern communicated with her friends and family would not have been able to explain the utter discomfort that wracked her now: wave after wave of radiating intensity that made her clench her teeth to keep from yelling out in some wordless call for help or comfort. Ember... she needed Ember. She needed her ma- .. her lo- ...

the woman she pushed away.

Palefern let out a low moan as another contraction washed over her, and she twisted in the nest that had been prepared for her with a violent sort of fervor (fever?) So hot, too hot... too much, too too - she felt the whimper leave her lips, a tell-tale vibration of her cheeks and tongue that sat heavy in the roof of her mouth. It felt... sticky, the sound. Like something had been caught on the tail-end of a string tied to her heart. Ember. Ember should've have been here, she needed to be here, needed to be wrapped around her; damned be the starvation and harshness that had split them. They could fix all of that la-

Her head drops down to torn-apart moss, her ears ringing an awful tuneless tone as she feels the pressure build and build and build, winding and twisting and pulling at her heart and her tendons and muscles (this was natural, she-cats for generations have had hundreds of litters before her, it was normal, it was -

over.

She is not quite sure when it ended, but before she could even yell out again (a true yell, one that called for the one she so desperately wanted), they were here. Two kittens for her troubles, both perfect, both gaping at their mother like pitiful little birds fresh from the egg. Trembling hands reach out, grasping to replace the senses she had been robbed of; the first, integral cries of her children needed to be felt rather than heard. Gently (oh so gently) does Palefern grace a paw against each of their fragile bodies, feeling for some more definitive source of life than what her eyes refused to believe.

She feels shallow breath on her skin, light and angry without milk, and it is enough to make her heart ache. There were no true words (spoken or signed) for the emotions that clawed at her now, no true way to explain that if she dared to touch these precious, untainted things again, she feared she might snuff out the little breaths she had been able to feel. She feared she might taint them with the same sadness that clung to her, the same loneliness, the same agony that had signaled their entrance into the world.

but still, she pulls them closer and curls around them, making herself a wall against the rest of the clan. the world. the entropy. that threatened to swallow her. them.

us.

And even still, the ringing continued its awful droll, robbing her (not for the first or last time) of the gentle sounds her children made at her belly, completely unfazed by the storm that raged inside their mother's head.
@serpentberry @hopekit @Heartkit

 

[Heartkit]

HEARTKIT OF THUNDERCLAN

The kit's wails echoed softly in the chilly air, their tiny form wriggling in protest against the unfamiliar cold. Everything was so strange and wrong!! Gone was the snug, safe warmth they had always known. Confusion and discomfort overwhelmed their tiny mind as their legs kicked aimlessly, a pitiful cry escaping their small muzzle.

The world outside their limited understanding was in turmoil, but the little kit knew none of it. They were too small to comprehend the absence of their other mama, too young to grasp the heartbreak that hung in the air like a storm cloud. All they knew was that they were cold, and they didn't like it.

Then, a touch. Soft, warm, and reassuring. The young one instinctively latched onto the familiar feeling, their small body wiggling closer. The comforting scent of their mama surrounded them, easing the ache of fear in their tiny chest. With frantic determination, they searched and found what they needed most, the warmth of milk.

The wailing ceased in an instant, replaced by the soft, rhythmic suckling of a kit who had found solace in their mother's embrace. The chill was forgotten, the confusion faded into the background. For now, there was only the warmth of their mama, the steady heartbeat in her chest, and the comforting presence of their sibling nearby.

In that moment, the kit was content. The world, strange and cold as it was, could wait. They had everything they needed... mama, warmth, and milk. And that was enough.

Here I am, so young and strong——･ﾟ✦​

･ﾟ✦ —— Right here in the place where I belong

 

[hopekit]

The first breath of air is icy cold, it tears at his throat with unfamiliar claws. He cries into the cold dark, small paws reaching out into that dark that will be all he knows for the next few sunrises– then he feels something warm, something soft, fluffy, and although he has no reference yet for neither good nor bad, this was perhaps the innate goodness of the world. A mother. A mother that loves you. He latches on to the thing that is good with desperate paws and a hungry jaw.

 

[serpentberry]

Serpentberry is retrieved, by her standards, too late. Cats mill about this camp day and night, she has her own litter to care for - and by the time she hears of Palefern's predicament, the caretaker has all but finished up by herself? Her frustrations are vented towards whoever catches her first, eyebrows pinched together and claws gaining purchace on the ground beneath her.

"I am busy, sure, but never too busy to help a laboring mother. By... by StarClan, how would you feel if -" she continues, badgering on about the complications and ready-made fears that come with labor and delivery. She had done it alone, yes, but she had the worrying paws of Rowan, the comfort of Snake, and her own medicinal knowledge to boot. This is Frond's - Palefern's - first litter, and therefore no plausible deniability that she even knew what she was doing outside of instinct!

Serpentberry halts her voice at the threshhold, the sound of kitten cries and nursing echoing in the small space. She swallows thickly, scenting the air for anything egregiously out of place. There's the usual, from what she understands and has experienced - and the bobbing, sobbing head of Palefern isn't unnatural either. That grief... is understood. Serpentberry's anger melts away, the only remnant for it held for the molly who separated from Palefern's side. I hope you're feeling the same pain, Ember.

She taps her tail to Palefern, a gentle wave of her paw after to try and maintain the exhausted she-cat's attention. Communication is difficult - frankly, Serpentberry has always been absorbed in her own world that she never truly made an effort to figure it out before. That makes her chest hurt more, she realizes. Should the molly allow her, the medicine cat nudges her nose into both sides of the kits, listening to their breathing and hearts briefly as she does. It's only then that she nods gently, as if to say, they're okay. "Are you -" she starts, and then with a motion of her paw and a tilt of her head, ears drooping with uncertainty. She should've tried sooner - but is there any use in this should have mentality? She can still put in the work now.

"Are you okay?" she verbalizes her words alongside ghosting her paw towards Palefern and then towards her own heart, hoping that at least begins to portray her line of quesrioning.

 

[THUNDERFLASH]

Thunderflash's ears keen backwards the instant he hears it- the sharp sob and whimper of something worse. He knows better then to shove his head in there, to risk the wrath of a caretaker in kitting. He liked his face, even with this newer scar, so instead of pushing in to ask if she was okay or if she needed anything, he had turned to retrieve Serpentberry. Better him that gets the brunt of her tongue-lashing then any other unfortunate soul, at this point, right? A noise leaves him as Serpentberry starts to complain, a quiet 'mhm'. Not complaining for herself, but for the soul that was in the den they were calling the nursery at this point.

"... How would I feel if what?" Thunderflash asks, wondering if Serpentberry was going to ask him how he would feel being stuck kitting alone. And that's not even a path of thought he wants to go down, a grimace spread on his features at the thought of it behind Serpentberry's back. But she's stopping before walking in, and he steps alongside her. A frown is on his face as well now- the scent of blood thick in the air, but not one of more nefarious origin. Baby blues look sidelong at her, blinking once. Empathetic to what she was about to do, he supposes. Thunderflash turns, watching her go on ahead first, and he breaths a sigh of relief. He detaches for a brief moment, returning water-soaked moss, then returns to-

Are you okay? Well, that was tactile. His head shakes briefly, stepping his way into the den that he refused to invade alone. Empathetic eyes blink at Palefern, who is a raging tide of emotion, then shift towards her young. Two small, and healthy looking kits. Well, he'd imagine they're healthy, given the fact they were eating on their own. That was a good sign, as far as Thunderflash could tell. He sets the moss down near Palefern's paws, trying not to get too close. "If y' need anything, just holler, aye? They're lovely, Palefern." Thunderflash says softly, careful not to disturb the air in here. As if the two specks at her side are nothing more then bits of dust and he can't breathe too hard.

Blue eyes shift towards Serp's green ones, then away. He knows, and he's sorry, but there's nothing more that he could say besides- "Do they have names yet? Could do with a Stick-kit 'round here." He says quietly, his smallest attempt at joke. Though who knows. Maybe Stick-kit would eventually make themselves known to this world, though he doubts it will come from this litter.

___________________ YOU'VE GOT MY BODY ☆ FLESH AND BONE, YEAH ___________________

• "speech"
  

• 

• THUNDERFLASH he/him, thunderclanner, twenty moons.
  ☆ a sh/lh chocolate tabby with low white and stunning baby blue eyes. stands of average height with a 'mohawk' and spiky-shaped mane.
  ☆ mentored by who / mentoring no one
  ☆ whichever relations / want listed
  ☆ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted / / underline and tag when attacking
  ☆ penned by dallas ↛ dallasofnines on discord, feel free to dm for plots.

 

[Copperstorm]

COPPER OF THUNDERCLAN

Copperstorm popped his head into the den just in time to catch Thunderflash's suggestion of "Stick-kit," prompting a quiet snort to escape him. His golden eyes gleamed with faint amusement as they swept over Palefern's form before settling on the larger tabby.

" I doubt any kit would want to be called Stick-kit, Thunderflash. " he rumbled, a playful edge to his voice. A flick of his tail punctuated his words before his expression softened, shifting to one of concern as he glanced back at Palefern. Her mate should have been here for her, should have been by her side to help her through this moment. But that wasn't their reality. All they could offer her now was the knowledge that she wasn't alone, even if the absence of her mate left an ache no one else could quite fill.

His gaze lingered on Palefern a moment longer, his thoughts briefly clouded by the challenge of communication. He knew Palefern struggled to hear them and had begun developing her own form of sign language. Though he admired her efforts, he had to admit he was far from fluent, a fact that frustrated him... Not at her, but at himself for not being better prepared.

Still, Copperstorm refused to let the barrier stop him. Locking eyes with Palefern, he searched for a way to offer her comfort or assistance. Food didn't seem right, kitting wasn't exactly the time for a meal. But maybe... water?

Gingerly, he dipped his head down and mimed licking the air twice, his ears twitching in a blend of determination and nervousness as he looked back up at her. " Would you like water? " he asked softly, his voice gentle but steady, hoping the motion and tone together would convey his intent.

For a heartbeat, he worried he might've flustered himself more than he'd helped, but he held her gaze, waiting patiently for any sign of her response.

you walk along the edge of danger ——･ﾟ✦​

･ﾟ✦ —— AND IT WILL CHANGE YOU