Sablestar was right. There was a mystery about this place. He was more than aware of the fact that the Shadowclan leader was talking about their history with this place, but to Riverclan's leader? His history with this place may not have been as long, but here he found death. The memory of Adderfang killing him still haunted his dreams from time to time. However, it is also here where he was given life. A small brown and white kit he calls his own, Pricklekit. Unfortunately, the oaks were cruel with this gift. They had decided not only to give him a child, but bring a familiar face as well.
A face he once caressed in the sunlight, fawning over golden red fur that could rival the sun itself. If not in appearance than by warmth. That night... He could feel those strong arms wrap around him, a tail entwined with his. It unsettled him. The feeling was good. Too good. He felt safe. Every fiber of his being yowled to moon, begging it to remind him what was lost under its glow. To remind him of the heartache and the loneliness. In the end, he could only sleep restlessly. Russetfall in all her bluntness had told him he looked terrible, which was met with a groan. He decided not to say it felt as if Adderfang took another one of his lives again.
Wanting to find some peace, he sought out the great oaks. Maybe he could find some answers here. Maybe Sablestar is here tonight. I wonder if he'll allow me to be near him again. Even if he wronged Riverclan, he was nice to speak to. He might just help me get my feelings sorted out. Fortune decided otherwise. The moment he entered the clearing, green eyes landed on the very cat he dreaded meeting. He couldn't turn away either. Goldenroar was staring at him as if he'd seen a ghost. Guess you weren't expecting me. The faint twitch of the Windclan deputy's maw amused Pikestar. You used to be so sure. What happened? Nervous? Am I really that frightening?
All Pikestar can do is smile. The rage he felt watching Goldenroar beside Dustystar who had her kit curled against her begins to boil. We could have been a family. It takes every ounce of strength he has not to yell at the Windclanner.
The silence shared between them is scathing. Pikestar can't help but find some joy in this. To have Goldenroar tongue tied. Granted, what would the Windclan deputy even say. What was there to say to someone you ran away from? I'll help you.
A face he once caressed in the sunlight, fawning over golden red fur that could rival the sun itself. If not in appearance than by warmth. That night... He could feel those strong arms wrap around him, a tail entwined with his. It unsettled him. The feeling was good. Too good. He felt safe. Every fiber of his being yowled to moon, begging it to remind him what was lost under its glow. To remind him of the heartache and the loneliness. In the end, he could only sleep restlessly. Russetfall in all her bluntness had told him he looked terrible, which was met with a groan. He decided not to say it felt as if Adderfang took another one of his lives again.
Wanting to find some peace, he sought out the great oaks. Maybe he could find some answers here. Maybe Sablestar is here tonight. I wonder if he'll allow me to be near him again. Even if he wronged Riverclan, he was nice to speak to. He might just help me get my feelings sorted out. Fortune decided otherwise. The moment he entered the clearing, green eyes landed on the very cat he dreaded meeting. He couldn't turn away either. Goldenroar was staring at him as if he'd seen a ghost. Guess you weren't expecting me. The faint twitch of the Windclan deputy's maw amused Pikestar. You used to be so sure. What happened? Nervous? Am I really that frightening?
All Pikestar can do is smile. The rage he felt watching Goldenroar beside Dustystar who had her kit curled against her begins to boil. We could have been a family. It takes every ounce of strength he has not to yell at the Windclanner.
"I was expecting someone else."
It isn't a complete lie. However, he knew there wasn't any reason to bring this up to Goldenroar other than bitterness. He looks around the clearing. "I guess I'm too early."
The silence shared between them is scathing. Pikestar can't help but find some joy in this. To have Goldenroar tongue tied. Granted, what would the Windclan deputy even say. What was there to say to someone you ran away from? I'll help you.
"It's been a long time, hasn't it?"
The reaction is immediate. He gives no room for Goldenroar to speak. "I thought I would never see you again."
There was no need for explanations. Even if many moons have passed since then, neither of them could forget how they felt. The despair he felt when he awoke to an empty nest began to worm itself in his heart once more. Back then... His hope was that something happened to Goldenroar. That he gone out to bring them food, but something went wrong. Yes, that is why he didn't return. However, deep in his heart he knew. Goldenroar discarded him. "To be honest I want to scream at you for what you did. Even looking at you is hard. Do you know how many moons I've grieved over you? I loved you more than anyone else. If we were moving too fast, all you needed to do was tell me. I would've waited."
Or was it me? Did you stop loving me then? No. Stop thinking about the reason. It's over. There's nothing left between us. He shakes his head. "It doesn't matter anymore. I don't want to hear your excuses. You made your choice."
- @GOLDENROAR everything will be alright trust
-
PIKESTAR— leader of riverclan, former shipyard cat
♱ 41 moons — he/him — ages realistically on the 1st — mentoring iciclepaw
♱ speech is"#36D9AB"— thoughts are italics — attacks are underlined
♱ short haired silver mackerel tabby with green eyes
♱ peaceful & healing powerplay permitted — underline & tag when attacking
♱ penned by velou — kasaven on discord — open to plots & dms