Private 🐺🐾first impressions🐾🐺 [Cloudberrypaw]

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AND I AM SORRY MY CONSCIENCE CALLED IN SICK AGAIN

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Deathberrykit. Fragile. Sickly. Spent more time wrapped in cobwebs and poultices than moss and milk. He wouldn't have recognized her if she passed him in camp three times over. Truth was, he hadn't spared her much thought at all– why would he, when her chances of survival had been so slim? He'd written them off weeks ago, assuming Cicadabuzz's experiments to make them better had ultimately failed.

And yet here she was.

His gaze finally shifted from Sablestar, blue and gold eyes dragging across the crowd until they landed on the little wisp standing beside Hemlockpaw. Small. Thing. Dark fur unkept– not because they hadn't tried grooming it, but because it lacked the healthy luster of the typical apprentices. A strong breeze looked like it could knock them flat– and the breeze out here was seldom kind.

He didn't show it, but the back of his mind itched with quiet calculation. She wasn't ready. Not by his standards. She shouldn't be out of the nursery, let alone on patrol.

And now she was his responsibility.

He stepped forward when the chanting died down, crossing the clearing with slow, measured steps until he stopped in front of her. He didn't crouch. Didn't smile. Just looked down, steady and quiet.

"Cloudberrypaw," he said at last, his voice low and even as he regarded the child of their healer. "Let's go. We're heading out."



  • ooc :@cloudberrypaw
  • shadowclan deputy - male - a large, black & blue chimera with moderate white splashing, mismatched eyes, and several scars.

 
Their attention had been focused on Cicadabuzz, watching as bug served its ire towards Sablestar and not them. They had not noticed that Wolfpack approached them on hefty paws, nor scrutinized their capabilities through dual-toned eyes. They only recognized the deputy's presence when the breeze that blew through camp became subtly interrupted. The young whelp turned to their mentor slowly, eyes half lidded as he calls them by their new name (something they'd need to get used to quickly.) No greeting, no pomp and circumstance. Just - "Let's go." And for some reason... she liked that.

They didn't want to be coddled anymore. They preferred the tom's willingness to ignore their obvious issues. In truth, even if it lands her in a ditch with no heartbeat, they'd be glad - because at least then, it was a hard won death by their own standards. Not one gifted simply because they were feather-held and disallowed to learn how to survive. Smaller paws follow after Wolfpack quickly, quietly. Their tail grazes the ground with every step, as if the energy to hold it above the ground would over exert them.

"What will we be doing first?" They ask the deputy. It's not hopeful - it's factual. Maybe there are ways to be prepared for different activities. Maybe the goal is to learn that there is no true preparation. Cloudberrypaw was willing to listen, at least.
 

AND I AM SORRY MY CONSCIENCE CALLED IN SICK AGAIN

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He answered her with a jerk of his head, gesturing for them to follow as he turned and began making his way toward the muddle slope leading out of camp.

"Today is about the basics, and getting you familiar with your surroundings." he answered coolly, not having much of a lesson planned prepared, but figuring the most obvious answers were the ones that should be addressed first. "Knowing where you come from and what's yours, matters. You can't defend something if you don't understand why it's worth keeping."

Well, you could but most cats wouldn't. That's how you ended up with disenters and deserters, cats that lacked motivation or trustworthiness. And if Wolfpack couldn't trust his future warriors to stand their ground or follow orders, what use were they?

The climb out of camp was easy for the tom, made with well-practiced paws as they expertly found the right path up the mud-slick slope, the burdened eased by the various stones and branches pressed into the bank to provide grip. He didn't stop to watch them attempt the climb after him. Didn't offer any pointers or sympathies for any struggles they may have had. Just reached the top and slipped through the dense foliage surrounding the hollow dip in the earth that was their camp.

He did pause once beyond them, though. Not a complete asshole. It was important for kids to figure things out on their own, to not be coddled or made to think things were a bigger deal than they actually were.

Once Cloudberrypaw had reached his side once again, be it seconds or a minutes later, he gave them a moment to take it all in.

"This, is Shadowclans territory." he said after a beat, mismatched eyes fixed outward. "But we didn't always live here. For us to reach it, we had to bleed for it first." he explained, lips pulling down into a faint frown as he recalled the group he'd joined all those seasons ago– not a clan, but a singular, massive colony living where the monthly gatherings now took place.

"Seasons ago, we lived elsewhere and had no name. The group was easily twice the size it is now, and for a long time it flourished." Simplified, but perhaps that was best when they were still so young and learning. "But one leafbare, everything fell apart. The leader fell ill, and when the next in line did nothing to save it's starving clan, a great war broke out between those who wished for true leadership, and those who clung to the sentiments of tradition."

It was a pretty way of saying 'half the clan had been so emotionally compromised, that they'd been willing to starve to death in their grief, rather then accept the change that would save them'. Adaptability was a lesson he would ingrain into her if it was the last and only thing he did. A cat that could not move or change, was as good as dead.

"The group that wanted change was run out of the territory that night, losing their home. Injured and half-starved, you'd of expected the elements to claim them soon after, but…"

That wasn't how the story ended. Not when the world was one big serving platter waiting to be snatched from. Hawthornes cats had been unwilling to take what they needed, but Sable's hadn't been. And there was always more out there to find if you had the fortitude to go looking and to sink your fangs in once it was found.

"Instead, they found this place, full of strange food, and good herbs. Bigger, and more plentiful than the old territory, even if it was a bit wetter. It's a lesson that every Shadowclanner should remember– that the world is far bigger than you could ever imagine, and there's always more to be found and had if you're strong or clever enough to get your claws on it."

Never limit yourself. Never accept less than wanted. Never be afraid to put yourself and your own first-- because at the end of the day, if you don't live to see another then your decisions were pointless. Survival wasn't always pretty or honorable or willing to follow the laws of tradition and codes.

"That's why this territory is so important to Shadowclan. Survival is hard work, and comfortability even more so, but the pocasin provides most of what we need right here in one spot. If we manage it properly and aren't afraid to go beyond our borders for resources as well, we can live here for generations without having to worry about the hardships that most others have to endure. It's not a perfect life, but it's far better than the alternative."

With a few exceptions, of course. There would always be things they didn't have-- certain types of herbs, or prey, or weather-- but not even Wolfpack was so disillusioned as to believe one could have perfection. Though, he certainly didn't see an issue with striving for the next best thing.


  • ooc : —​
  • shadowclan deputy - male - a large, black & blue chimera with moderate white splashing, mismatched eyes, and several scars.