Open Backwritten Medicine Cat's Den TW: DEATH goodbyes in the starlight // jinglemoon

[Willowleaf Willowleaf]

⋆˚✿˖° Though I walk in silence, my heart speaks loud in the stars above.

She had fought hard. Her spirit was fierce, but her body… her body had been too small, too frail. Watching the kit struggle, seeing the life flicker and fade despite every effort, was heartbreaking. And for the mother... Willowleaf could only imagine how it must have felt to watch her child slip away, powerless to stop it. The queen looked exhausted, sunken in sleep wrought from grief and sheer physical collapse. Willowleaf stepped gently into the medicine den, her star-touched paws gliding softly across the floor. Her gaze swept over Jinglemoon, the young medicine cat who had worked himself ragged, and then over the two kits. One... still breathing, a small rise and fall of fur curled tightly beside the unmoving fluff of his sister.

The little she-kit, still and quiet now. Willowleaf's heart clenched. She leaned down, touching her nose softly to the kit's forehead. A breath of starlight passed from her. " You will not face this alone, little one... " she whispered. " Though it feels like everything is lost... " A shimmer began to rise. A gentle figure, translucent and star-lit, slowly began to take shape beside her: the kit's soul. Tiny. Wide-eyed. Confused.

Willowleaf turned her head toward Jinglemoon, her expression solemn, tender. " I am sorry, young one... " she said softly to the medicine cat. " But know this, you did everything you could. Tirelessly. Selflessly. You fought for her with all you had. " Her eyes flicked to the surviving kit, his sides moving with sleep. " You saved one. You gave him a future. " She glanced back at the spirit of the little she-kit as the kit looked around, then up, eyes filled with sorrow as she pressed close to Wavesong.

" Mama…? " the starry figure mewed, her tiny voice trembling. She turned to Jinglemoon, ears flicking back. " Stay…? "

Willowleaf's throat tightened. " We cannot. " she murmured, voice full of aching gentleness. She rasped her tongue once across the kit's head, comforting her as best she could as the tiny kit pressed her face close to Wavesong's face, tears gathering in her eyes. Then, carefully Willowleaf took her by the scruff, lifting her with great gentleness. Before stepping away into the starlit veil, she met Jinglemoon's gaze one last time.

" Tell her... " she said quietly. " Tell her that her love will always reach her kit. And when he looks up at the stars… she will be looking back. "

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ooc: This is set the 15th of July !!

 

[Jinglemoon]

JINGLEMOON, 27 Moons, RiverClan Medicine Cat // He/They // #3b90ff
A long furred blue tabby tom with low white, long pointed ears with curved tips and dazzling blue eyes.
Sibling to ASTRO, Uncle to TWINKLEPAW, ECLIPSEPAW and COMETPAW
Mentoring RAINPAW
Usually walks with a jingle in his step. Good listener and always thoughtful.
Played by DINGO

---

He had hardly gotten a wink of sleep for what felt like several moons at this point. Ever since Wavesong's litter had been born with some complications to two of the kits he had spent all of his time within the medicine den tending to them and anytime he did go out was only ever to collect herbs in hopes he'd find one that would make them all better.

None of his efforts ever felt like they were enough though.

Shellkit especially seemed to continue fading despite how much she fought, and how much he fought for her as well. With a ferocity and courageousness stronger then any cat he knew, Shellkit had struggled for her will to keep on living for every sunhigh and sunset she had been blessed with living. But it wasn't enough... Though her spirit wanted to keep on fighting her body had had enough.

Jinglemoon had been just about to slip into sleep when a soft glow began to wash over the medicine den. He blinked sleepily and raised his head from his nest meeting the gaze of a star-touched cat, for a few brief moments he stared in disbelief. StarClan! Yes! Oh StarClan! Surely they had finally sent someone to come help him to save little Shellkit and Troutkit! Of course, StarClan would not simply stand by and watch two young kits struggle and suffer as they had! They deserved to cuddle up with their littermates and feel the warmth of their mother's love without the lingering fear that she currently held behind it, always hoping and praying that they would make it another night.

Hope shimmered in his eyes like the stars that shimmered in the other cats' pelt as he wearily lifted himself back up and out of his nest as the StarClan cat leaned down to touch a nose to Shellkit's forehead, he would help the starry-pelted cat to help save Shellkit in anyway he could no matter how tired and-- ... But, wait? What was she doing? The hope that had once sparkled in the medicine cats' eyes shattered as he watched in anguished horror as a tiny soul began to take shape beside the StarClanner, donning her own starry pelt far too soon, far too small...

"No! No please!" He scrambled now, slipping and hitting his chin against the floor of the medicine den in his hurry to race over before Shellkit could be taken away forever, not daring to look yet at her still body in the nest with her mother, as though by doing so he would have to admit that she was already gone. The starry cat was apologizing to him, reassuring him that he had done everything he could do to help the kit, that he had saved Troutkit but he was frantic, tears beginning to well as he begged "Please don't take her! I-I can still save her! I can! I c-can save them both! Please please just give me more time! Just another week! I'll do anything! Please..."

Jinglemoon had become heart achingly familiar and close with the silver tabby kit in the brief time she had been able to bless them with, and Wavesong... His friend. His heart broke for her, he had promised. He had promised... And he had failed to keep it. Even for his most dearest friend.

He gasped in the cool night's air in sharp, quick breaths as tears began to fall as he looked down to the tiny star-blessed kit now. Her eyes wide and confused. She had deserved so much better than this. So much more time than this. And though he knew he'd do anything to give her that time, he knew no amount of herbs nor medical knowledge could give her it. Nothing within his power could, not even StarClan could. He knew it, but he didn't want to believe it. As if holding onto some sliver, some shred of hope might be enough to bring her spirit back to her frail body that grew colder beside her mother who didn't even know yet that her daughter was gone.

His bleeding heart broke fully and completely when the spirit of Shellkit pressed close to Wavesong and mewed for her before turning to him, asking if she could stay. "I'm... I'm so sorry little guppy" He croaked, his voice cracking from grief, his blue eyes filled with a sorrow that could not be adequately put into words. He wanted so badly to tell her she could stay, he looked to the other starry cat with fresh tears trying once more to plead for an outcome that he knew was beyond reach. "Please don't do this, don't take her away. Please. She has a family and clanmates who love her and want to see her grow up..." For Wavesong's sake, for Adderfang, for her littermates, her siblings, her clanmates. For Shellkit... She wanted to stay. She still wanted to fight for her will to live, why couldn't she stay? She hadn't given up! He hadn't given up...

Jinglemoon's blue pelt stiffened as the older StarClan cat picked the tiny scrap of stars up by the scruff, with the same gentleness her mother should've been allowed to show her for many moons to come. The tabby tom moved as if to try and stop the starry pelt from taking the kit away as she moved away into a starlit veil of sorts. But it was no use. Shellkit was in StarClan's care now, not his. "I'm sorry Shellkit. I'm so, so sorry" He hoped that one day she could forgive him, but whether or not he could ever forgive himself was another thing all together. The medicine cat's mews had devolved into pitiful whimpers but he managed to meet the gaze of Shellkit's starry escort one last time.

Tell her? How could he? How could he break this news to Wavesong? She had grieved so much for these kits already, she had suffered so much already. Why couldn't she have been allowed just this one thing. Why...?

He turned now to the nest to face the reality that had become of Shellkit, seeing her tiny, lifeless frame sent down a new wave of anguish and the medicine cat would let out a wail more painful, more agonized than the one he had cried out when sliced by Jadethorn in this very same den all that time ago. Pressing his nose into the now still scrap of silver tabby fur and gently nudging her in a vain attempt to wake her up from a never ending slumber, as if this whole thing had hopefully just been some terrible sleep deprived nightmare.

One he would never wake from, and neither would Shellkit.

 

[Willowleaf Willowleaf]

⋆˚✿˖° Though I walk in silence, my heart speaks loud in the stars above.

The other pleaded, begged, but there was only so much Willowleaf could do. All she could offer was comfort, to ensure the kit would not wander into the stars alone and afraid. She knew Jinglemoon understood this too. He had seen it. The signs. Her strength had been fading for some time. Every extra heartbeat had been a gift, perhaps even a blessing from StarClan itself. " I wish I could place her in your care, Jinglemoon... " Willowleaf said at last, voice low and heavy with sorrow. She swallowed hard and shook her head slowly. " But I cannot. What I can promise is this: she will be looked after. We will guard her with all the love you cats gave her. "

Her heart fractured with every step she took. For a moment, she regretted coming now. If she had only arrived while they slept, it might have been quieter. Gentler. Easier. But how could she blame the living for trying to hold on to what mattered most? She halted as Jinglemoon stepped in front of her. Her eyes met his, kind and filled with a sadness few would ever know. She did not speak, only closed her eyes for a moment and lowered her head. Just enough for a small paw to bat gently at one of the bells he wore.

" Jingle, jingle… " the kit's quiet voice rose, soft and airy. She batted again, though her paw touched nothing. " Jingle, jingle… " she repeated, eyes wide and unknowing as she reached out. Her paws brushed toward his nose, trying to hold on. To hug. " ...Mama… warm… love... " she whispered, blinking slowly. " Jingle… Jingle warm… love… " A soft bat of her paw to his whiskers.

Willowleaf's heart ached anew, but she kept her voice steady, gentle. " Blame yourself not, Jinglemoon... " she murmured. " Continue forward. Even in pain, you will rise again. And a new day will come. " With one final glance, Willowleaf turned and began to cross through the veil, carrying the kit close, her tiny star-lit form nestled against her.

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[Wavesong]

And that's why we share all we have with you
Though there's little to be found
When all you've got is nothing
There's a lot to go around

.

So much had happened. She was exhausted, beyond exhausted. Every fiber of her being cried out for rest, but it never truly came. When sleep did find her, it was fractured, filled with jagged visions. Claws, blood, empty nests. Kits that died. Kits that might. Dreams of futures with no father beside them. Of being left behind. Of being alone. And then there was a wail. Was it a dream, or-- Her eyes flew open, breath catching in her throat. Blue irises darted wildly in the dimness, searching, until they landed on Jinglemoon's face.

" Jingle-bingle... ye scared me half t'death... " she murmured, voice heavy with sleep. " W...what's...? " But her words fell away. The look on his face. The way his muzzle nudged something at her side-- No. No. Oh, Stars... Her blood ran cold, the remnants of sleep stripped away in a heartbeat. Slowly, dread curdling in her chest, she followed his gaze, down to the tiny, curled body nestled against her side. Among her other kits. Still. Silent.

" ...Shell? " she whispered, reaching to nudge her gently with her nose, hope clawing at her chest. She waited, for a twitch, a breath, anything. Nothing. There was warmth, yes, but it was fading. " No... " she moaned, voice breaking, pain blooming like fire in her chest. " Shell...! " Desperately she began grooming the little one's head, her tongue trembling as it rasped through fur that was far too still. Her eyes lifted to Jinglemoon, brimming with a panic that bordered on madness.

" J...Jingle, p-please... please, she... she can't... " The words tumbled from her mouth like stones, cracked and useless. " She can't... " But she knew. She knew. It was written on his face. It was written in Shellkit's stillness. The truth hit her like a crashing wave, and from her throat tore a sound of such raw anguish it shook the night, a cry ripped straight from her soul. She drew her kits close, clutching them against her chest as tears carved silver paths down her cheeks. A daughter. Another daughter, gone. First Coral... now Shell.

She had tried. Stars knew, she had tried, for all six of them.

And still, one she could not save...

Speech, thoughts/emphasis

37 MOONS

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RIVERCLANNER

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