Sunningrocks Territory A HEART FULL OF LOVE . ݁₊ ⊹ lavenderpaw

[ASTERPAW]

x

He had nearly died to the river and that bird of prey but someone had pulled him out from the depths of the cooling waters, he woke with a cough, and sputter as water spills from his jaws but what never left his memory was the slate-gray pelt that shone underneath the sun's gentle light. How it appeared silver from a quick glimpse and it made him truly believe that he had died only to join Starclan. The presence of his clanmates reassured him that hadn't been the case and even as he stayed within the medicine den so that they made sure that he didn't fall ill, he couldn't stop thinking about them or rather her, and how she seemed to haunt his mind.

The chocolate tabby couldn't stop thinking about soft curls and a sleek pelt built for swimming unlike his own, a sniffle or two leaving him, and his paws shuffled unable to stop the way that they troubled nor the way his heart seemed to flutter within his chest. Asterpaw felt as if he were ill but he allowed his mind to wander and think about the kind molly during his training or whenever he found himself to be alone with his own thoughts. The son of Juniperstar and Sablestar finds that he isn't able to sleep within the nest for much longer as he shifts through the small collection of insect wings that he had, he carefully tucks a pair of monarch butterfly wings into his chest, and carefully made his way out of the apprentice den.

His amber gaze flicking in the direction of his mother's den knowing that she must be sound asleep with Serpentberry at her side and his ears lay flat against his skull, the tabby tom doesn't hesitate to creep out from camp when he sees the opportunity. He has never been out of camp by himself and he feels as if his heart is going to explode from how loudly it beats within his chest, Asterpaw swallows trying to ignore the way that anxiety seems to gnaw at his skin until he finds himself drawing closer to the spot where he had seen her from across the river. His eyes turning to blink at Sunningrocks remembering how sunlight had cast over it and shone on her silver pelt, Asterpaw closes the distance between the water and himself despite the way it makes him want to turn back.

"L-Lavenderpaw?" Asterpaw calls out with a small frown and he can't help but wince knowing that she isn't foolish enough to sneak out of camp like him, he should just head home and he's prepared to do so until the scent of Riverclan tickles his nose.

IN FIVE YEARS TIME WE MIGHT NOT SPEAK

ASTERPAW

THUNDERCLAN APPRENTICE
TRANS MASC x HE/HIM/THEY/THEM​

x

"speech", thoughts, attacking
a runty, longhaired chocolate tabby with clay toned eyes and low white. a sickly apprentice with small patches of fevercoat left over in his pelt, kitten fuzz, and fat that clings to him but is fading away to give way to a taller/more lanky build
sickly child of juniperstar and sablestar; littermate of dreampaw and magpiepaw

asterpaw's an introverted apprentice that keeps to himself for the most part unless family's involved, he usually keeps his head low and eyes averted so he doesn't make direct eye contact. once, he actually gets to know someone is he more open towards them and can prove to be a devoted friend. once he's comfortable around other individuals, he tends to speak a lot more and sometimes over shares about himself without realizing it. he hates that he was born sickly but despite it, he tries to overcome it and pushes himself harder than any of the apprentices

 

[lavenderpaw]

She sits by the camp's slow-flowing stream in near silence, gaze tilted skywards. For once, clouds do not overwhelm the stars, and she can see so clearly how they glitter. Lavenderpaw doesn't often romanticize... well, anything - she's a molly of reality, preferring hard truths over hazy wonders. Yet when she stares to the blanket of the night, there is that glimmer of a thought... Are you seeing it, too? Do his trees obscure the sky so horribly, that they do not see the same moon, the same stars? Or does he know the right spots to look upwards, and does he wonder if she sees it all the same?

It's odd, repetitive even - how she continuously runs into the dark pelted tom. It's as if the stars stitch them together in every situation. On border patrols, in false-gatherings or half-parties. That day by the river - oh, that day by the river. Frostmoth had ushered her away so quickly, the only solace she has today that the ThunderClan boy survived is that no forest-made patrol came bearing down on her camp, demanding blood for a drowned corpse. Still, she thinks about it. She thinks about him, and how despite being waterlogged, snot-nosed, coughing and heaving - how disastrously beautiful he appeared. Cowardly, fearful, near death... yet he looked at her as if she was an angel, and that glimmer in his eyes never left her.

She haunts him like a phantom, plaguing his every move, squeezing his heart with every step. And he does the same unknowingly. He breathes from across the river, full of life, full of warmth, and Lavenderpaw feels a perpetual peace with the world because of it.

There's a tap. Her gaze falls to the water that laps at her paws, and right there, right there, is a peace of seaglass. It's unlike any other. Blues and greens and browns, she's used to - but this weathered stone is orange. Translucent, and shiny when washed with water. She'd akin it to amber. Or, even better - his eyes. Perhaps not perfect - this seaglass is undoubtedly more ochre than umber - but it's a sign. A sign. She doesn't check to see if anyone is watching. Her careful nature is dismantled the second she collects the seaglass between her teeth and leaps across the thinnest stretch of the river. If someone calls for her, chases after her, she doesn't listen. Instead, she presses forth, racing to the river, to the border, and hopeful that a sign has brought him here, too.

When he calls, she hears him. His voice isn't steady, but the tremor reroutes her heart entirely. The beats are doubled, stumbling over themselves. She stops in the brush just before the river's edge, eyes widening as she takes the moment to try and calm herself. Yet, before she can catch her breath and be the cool and collected molly she often presents as... her paws are impatient. Reeds part and the blue molly shows herself in the glimmering moonlight, looking across the river at Asterpaw in all of his glory. And - by the stars - he's alone. The undergrowth doesn't rattle behind him, and a quick taste of the air tells her that he hadn't brought anyone with him.

"Asterpaw..." she breathes out his name around the seaglass. In the darkness of the night, she can't quite see the gift he brought. However, unabashedly, she strides closer to the river's edge. "I'm... going to go over to your side," she warns him. Better that than to have him try crossing the rapids again. Her nerves jitter as she takes the dryer path, stepping on the surfaced stones across the river, painstakingly slow. She can manage the current, she's sure, but she will not risk dropping this seaglass. Eventually she draws close enough that she steps down into the water, wading out from ankle deep shallows. She waits still by the shore, unsure if she's welcome further in. This... this is already testing boundaries. The seaglass is placed gently on dry sand.

"I didn't think..." at all. She picked up her sign and ran. Her wind-swept pelt is a sign of as much. Her ears twist back and forth, as if listening constantly for eavesdroppers, "You're - well..." for once, Lavenderpaw is at a loss for words. She doesn't know what to say. There is, perhaps, too much to say at all. Finally, she breathes, "I'm glad to see you."

 

[ASTERPAW]

x

It's as if the wind had blown his gentle call to her and she stands at the other side of the river, he can feel his heart within his throat as if he had swallowed a frog, and he almost forgets to breathe altogether as he finds himself staring at her once more like he had when he opened his eyes after she saved him. He's speechless as she seems to utter his name around something held gently within her jaws and he wishes that he could meet her halfway, to stand upon the stones like her, and to be brave yet his paws are frozen against the pebble covered shore. Lavenderpaw says that she'll go over to him to which he nods quietly in response and he can hear his heart thundering within his ears, both of his ears angling forward as he watches her cross the stones, and it almost felt like a lifetime before she joins him on his side of the border.

She remains in the water with the river lapping at her limbs and he watches her set the prize once secured in her jaws be placed onto the ground, he realizes that its a piece of seaglass, and it seems to shine like amber underneath the moonlight. A treasure brought from the depths of which tried to end his life and yet, he can only feel the way that his face seems to grow warm at the thought of that piece of seaglass being for him. No, no... maybe he's overthinking it and it was a gift for someone else... someone more worthy of Lavenderpaw's time and presence. He feels as if he were some selfish, greedy weed that drinks up the warm rays of Lavenderpaw's light and it makes him wonder what she sees in him that he can't quite see.

She speaks and its like music to his ears, Asterpaw blinking his eyes rather bashfully with his ears pressing flat against his skull with a shy chuckle slipping from his jaws "I-I... I didn't really think either." He admits truthfully so that the both of them could feel a little bit silly together and her just existing as this ethereal being to him, it renders him speechless. Lavenderpaw breathes out the words that she's glad to see him, his head feels lightheaded in that moment as if he could pass out that second, and he can't help the warm smile that crosses his face as he looks at her "M-me too..."

Something about the way that Lavenderpaw looks to him causes his heart to soar and makes him feel as light as a feather, she doesn't look at him like filth like some of his denmates do, and she doesn't sneer in his direction nor sends irritated glares his way. She stares at him like there's so much more to him and a small part of him wishes to be that for her but he dares not utter that despite the countless times that they've run into one another. It makes him wish that there wasn't a river splitting their territories from each other, that borders didn't exist and there was no need for bloodshed, and everything would be perfect... If only he had been born in Riverclan rather than Thunderclan, a family split between their clans, and hated from either side.

He felt as if he were some jagged puzzle piece being shoved into the wrong place repeatedly until he fit and even then... none of it ever felt right. And here, he finds himself drinking in the moonlight and sharing the same air as Lavenderpaw that he almost forgets the wings that he had tucked into the ivory fur near his chest. "I... I buh-brought you these." Asterpaw confesses at last with a timid smile and he would've placed them on the ground too if he knew these frail wings wouldn't shatter, so, he stares at Lavenderpaw for a heartbeat longer, "Here, uh, let me..."

The chocolate tabby draws closer trying to ignore the water as he focuses onto Lavenderpaw and if she draws close enough, Asterpaw delicately removes the wings one by wing from his chest and carefully places them behind the ears of the other apprentice. He steps back not liking that the river had lapped at his own limbs and shakes them off momentarily only to stare at the molly now adorned with a pair of butterfly wings. "You're... beau-beautiful." The words slipping out and he snaps his jaws shut in embarassment that he had uttered such a thing but it isn't a lie... out of all the clans, Riverclan seemed to be the most gorgeous.

IN FIVE YEARS TIME WE MIGHT NOT SPEAK

ASTERPAW

THUNDERCLAN APPRENTICE
TRANS MASC x HE/HIM/THEY/THEM​

x

"speech", thoughts, attacking
a runty, longhaired chocolate tabby with clay toned eyes and low white. a sickly apprentice with small patches of fevercoat left over in his pelt, kitten fuzz, and fat that clings to him but is fading away to give way to a taller/more lanky build
sickly child of juniperstar and sablestar; littermate of dreampaw and magpiepaw

asterpaw's an introverted apprentice that keeps to himself for the most part unless family's involved, he usually keeps his head low and eyes averted so he doesn't make direct eye contact. once, he actually gets to know someone is he more open towards them and can prove to be a devoted friend. once he's comfortable around other individuals, he tends to speak a lot more and sometimes over shares about himself without realizing it. he hates that he was born sickly but despite it, he tries to overcome it and pushes himself harder than any of the apprentices

 

[lavenderpaw]

She cannot claim to know what goes on in his head. In truth, Lavenderpaw does not know much about the other apprentice at all. His allegiance could be a complete assumption, for all she knows - his name an entire lie. Everything about him could be a purposeful misstep from the truth and yet she willingly falls for the trap. If Juncopaw or Rosemarypaw were in her position, she would be furious - she would jab a paw in their business and point out every aching flaw. Yet when she looks at him, the only ache she can discern is the one in her heart, asking her why she hasn't drawn closer yet.

He laughs, something dry and lackluster, but not empty. Asterpaw's mannerisms tell her everything his hoarse, raspy voice cannot convey. His nerves must rattle like hers. This encounter is a surprise to the both of them, undoubtedly so - she wonders how long he waited for her. If this is the first night or one of several. The string pulled taut on her heart hadn't tugged until tonight, but in truth that doesn't bring much solace. If they're to meet again... -

Again. She plans the future as if this moment isn't ongoing. She says, "I'm glad to see you." He returns with a smile and a bashful, "Me too." Again, because what is this encounter outside of mutual yearning? This escape from their individual worlds to deviate from the norm? Perhaps it's fleeting, maybe in a few moons this will fade (she hopes it doesn't.) But for now - ( again! ) - she happily enjoys this night with her own uncertain, softened smile.

She isn't sure what to say next, but luckily, he fills the air. He pulls two wings from his chest fur and announces that he's brought her something. The stone by her paws - a sight he noticed but she hadn't caught the recognition - suddenly feels too sharp at the edges and too dull to pass off compared to the wings he procured. Lavenderpaw has half a mind to shove the seaglass back into the water and act as if it never existed, and perhaps marvel at his gift alone for the rest of the night. But - with big but gentle paws, he insists on placing the wings by her ears himself. She tilts her head down, her cheek grazing the soft fur if his chest while he worked. She can feel the rapid thrumming of his heart just as much as the labored breathing in his lungs. She remains as still as possible unwilling to ruin his art (as much as shs is unwilling to move from this partial embrace.) He tugs away first, and she notices that it is because the water kissing his ankles. She withholds a grimace or a pout, simply fixing her posture in response.

What he says causes her cheeks and ears to burn more than they've already had. She almost mutters out something more embarrassing - "If you think I'm pretty, you should see my sister!" - And, perhaps there's truth to that at a distance. While rarely the vain sort, it's this moment where Lavenderpaw recognizes her minor jealousies in Juncopaw. Her sister had been born with more visual interest - points and patterns where the moonlit girl remains slate. But Asterpaw, stranger he is and as strange as he was, thinks she's beautiful. Her heart beats ever faster as she struggles with any words at all, eventually landing on a quiet, "Thank you..." Her paws remain ground bound, as much as she wants to reach up and feel the wings. Her gaze falls to the tide by her ankles, the moonlight affording her enough of a reflection to see the wings shadows. Her tail twitches in quiet delight before she recalls her seaglass.

"It's a good thing... I brought you this, then," she says. The stone is lonely, however, and she suddenly regrets how quickly she's acted. The blue furred molly pulls her smile into a thin line of disappointment, twisting around to look by the shore line. "Wait - wait, it's missing something..." Embarrassment is now what burns her ears. This happenstance encounter with a coincidence gift, and Lavenderpaw still finds a means to be dissatisfied. She reaches for a few tall reed stems nearby and makes quick work of them, creating something of a tiny net and nestling the seaglass within it. The reeds naturally form a final, far larger loop with how she's tangled them, so he can hang it on his neck or tail, or wrap around his paw a few times... Or not at all.

Lavenderpaw presents her modified gift with a quiet, "That's better. They're easier to wear when they're woven up like this." The girl feels more natural, more in her element as she explains her processes. Even then, her tail taps the ground with her jitters. She balances on her hindlegs, quietly offering the inquiry of, "May I...?" Should he kneel over for her, the molly would loop the necklace over his head, nesting it in the thick fur of his neck. She takes a few moments adjusting the weave more more, before resting a paw against the other's chest for a moment too long. She pulls her arm back and tries to distract with a question, "So... what do you think?"

 

[ASTERPAW]

x

The way that they were locked in a partial embrace was enough to make him feel lightheaded knowing that he had never been this close to anyone outside of his family and really, he should be more cautious about those across the border especially with what happened during the gathering. His mother killed in front of all the clans because Owlbark had murdered one of Skyclan's warriors and Hawkstar had demanded blood, she had demanded a life for a life. And yet here with Lavenderpaw so near, its intoxicating in a sense and he almost wishes to not break away even as the river lapped at his ankles though the fear in the back of his mind pushes him away. If she were truly dangerous or had ill intentions then she would've acted upon them and she wouldn't have saved him from the river after having been attacked by an eagle.

She had been his saving grace and angelic being that had descended down from Silverpelt itself to rescue him, a part of him feels as if he had died and been born anew, and even if he had been close to death's talons... he had been close to her as well. It felt silly thinking that someone could shift the way that he looked at things normally and he isn't sure about this feeling... should he welcome it, surely, it would fade away with time (he prays to their ancestors that it doesn't). When he places the gift near his ears and feels her muzzle close to his chest, Asterpaw doesn't fear the possibility of jaws meeting flesh but rather finds himself fearful that she might hear the way that his lungs breathe differently or the way that his heart beats loudly within his chest.

Do you hear it? The way my heart races around you? How it skips? ... He thinks silently still holding her gaze as he watches her briefly glance at her reflection within the water and she utters a 'thank you' at his compliment to which he offers a warm, genuine smile. "Of course..." The chocolate tabby offers timidly though his attention shifts as she mentions that she has brought him something too and he can't help but feel as if his own heart will burst. A gift for him? He's never recieved a gift before from anyone so to be given something by someone so special and dear, oh, he could just die where he stood but he blinks the wet feeling from his gaze.

He would've taken the seaglass as it was but she goes through the effort of weaving it around with some reeds until it made a loop and the smile never seems to leave his face "F-for me? Wow." A soft chuckle slips from his jaws seeing the modified gift and he can feel that lightheaded feeling returning as if he's stepping upon clouds in this instant, Asterpaw's copper gaze locks with her bicolored one as he listens to her words; May I? The tom has to bite down on his tongue to not answer so swiftly, so eagerly, and he gives a nod of his head as he murmurs quietly "Yes..." They're close once more and he swears that he could hear their hearts beating in unison as his eyes watch her place the new accesory around his throat, her paw lingering on his chest, and a part of him wishes to reach forth with his own so that he could hold her their a moment longer.

The chocolate tabby drifts off in his own thought feeling vulnerable and seen in that moment... her voice pulls him out from his mind as she asks what he thinks and the half-clan prince falls utterly silent, there's so much that he wishes to say, and he doesn't know if he has enough breath to spare to say it so he simply settles with "P-perfect." His warm eyes never leaving hers as he states this honestly, as if plucked from his heart itself, and he doesn't know if he speaks of the gift or her.

"T-thank you..." The half-clan prince utters to her in a quiet voice as if not wishing for the wind to carry their voices and expose them to their clans.

Thank you for saving me... thank you for this gift... for meeting me here tonight... thank you for opening my eyes, my heart, and... His thoughts trail off not wishing to let the words continue, he thanks the stars that she's unable to read his mind, and a part of him wishes that she could. "I'll cherish it forever and keep it with me always." Asterpaw promises as an ivory paw lifts to touch the seaglass so that he can feel its surface and the way it nestles into the fur belonging to his chest, settling near his heart, as if she has given a part of herself to him.

His eyes search her own, studying her expression, and the way her curls shine like silver underneath the moonlight so that he may keep it in his memory but his jaws open suddenly as he speaks "W-will you meet me again? I wish to see... to see you... a-again." A part of him winces at the words that he blurts out, his mother and father are separated by their clans, and here he is... seeking out a girl from Riverclan. A hypocrite, a son that has not fallen far from either tree, and yet... he buries it all away believing that this is harmless and surely, it wouldn't blossom to something more. How could anyone love someone as sickly and pathetic as him? A selfish weed in a field of flowers.

The very same weed that begs for the sun to bestow her light onto him so that he'd bleed in her warmth and feel that same adoration that flowers recieved. A hopeless amount of yearning... does she feel it too? Could she sense his desparation and would she leave him without a second thought? He prays, oh, he prays that she'd entertain their antics for longer. He almost wishes to apologize for wasting her time when she could've been sound asleep within her nest but he bites down on his tongue instead with ears pressing flat against his head unable to shake off this burning feeling that makes a home underneath his skin.

CITY OF STARS; ARE YOU SHINING JUST FOR ME?

ASTERPAW

THUNDERCLAN APPRENTICE
TRANS MASC x HE/HIM/THEY/THEM​

x

"speech", thoughts, attacking
a runty, longhaired chocolate tabby with clay toned eyes and low white. a sickly apprentice with small patches of fevercoat left over in his pelt, kitten fuzz, and fat that clings to him but is fading away to give way to a taller/more lanky build
sickly child of juniperstar and sablestar; littermate of dreampaw and magpiepaw; padding after lavenderpaw

asterpaw's an introverted apprentice that keeps to himself for the most part unless family's involved, he usually keeps his head low and eyes averted so he doesn't make direct eye contact. once, he actually gets to know someone is he more open towards them and can prove to be a devoted friend. once he's comfortable around other individuals, he tends to speak a lot more and sometimes over shares about himself without realizing it. he hates that he was born sickly but despite it, he tries to overcome it and pushes himself harder than any of the apprentices

 

[lavenderpaw]

The spots where his paws touched continue to burn long after he lingers. The sound of his heart and the way it stutters compounds still in her ears. The softness of his chest fur beneath her paw makes it itch long before it touches the ground once more. He infects her - wholly, entirely, she finds herself completely and utterly diseased by whatever Asterpaw has given her. She almost laughs internally, wonders if she's next to have a nose that never stops running, if her lungs will crackle and her voice will croak... Lavenderpaw, however, doesn't find herself vain enough to be truly worried about the notion. Instead she revels in the phantom pains and discomforts, for they're signs that he was there.

He, a ThunderClan-ShadowClan mess. He, a complete and utter stranger. Yet he, who she decides in the moment can cradle the delicate threads of her heart in his own two paws and do whatever he would wish with them. She no longer dictates the way they knot and tie - the very beating of her chest is conducted by his symphony. Even if he doesn't know it, Asterpaw has been given every last drop of Lavenderpaw's heart.

He's enamored by her gift. His, "Wow," alone pushes her to her toes, rocking back onto her heels with an obtuse happiness that must be released. "I found it - and I thought of you..." Of his eyes, though she still detests how minutely different the glass is from his true gaze. She doubts she'll find anything closer. Rocks and stones are abysmally boring, and whatever made that shard of glass before it was weathered must've only broken so little, as she's not seen any other color like it yet. However when she asks his opinion - and holds herself back from reinforcing an unspoken understanding, "I can find you better ones, if this one is too big, or too small or too yellow, or -"

But he replies. He finds the anxieties that've swelled in her mottled gaze and swipes them away with ease. His smile is warm, and he holds her there as he says, "Perfect." His gratitude follows with the same kindness and sincerity, and Lavenderpaw thinks she may just fall over with the genuine affection he shares. She hardly thinks of the distance they must hold based on borders alone - thinks less of how he errs away from the water's edge, unused to its chill. The blue furred molly finds herself romanticizing every aspect of the night, if only to revel in some prolonged happiness. She can scrutinize her own idiocy in the morning. After all, this could be as fleeting as a weed - a dandelion puff one breeze away from dismantling.

... Yet even a dandelion puff has its uses. Its seeds spread to crop up more just like it, exponentially growing. A testament to hardiness and assuredness. Having 'a use' can only be dictated by one's self. A dandelion finds itself useful when it's life cycle is complete and it begins the next; a warrior finds themself useful once they fish up a catch or protect their land; Lavenderpaw finds herself useful in supporting the building blocks of her Clan, allowing new traditions to soak her to her bones if they must. Asterpaw... as useful as a weed, remains beautiful in a way only a few can see, as skilled as those knowledgeable are able to tell, and almost unrelenting in how he presents himself tonight.

"I'll cherish it forever," he says with unrelenting sincerity, "and keep it with me always." Persistent, with unabashed assuredness. "Will you meet me again?" Certainty pools in his umber gaze, hope and joy dancing within.

A sharp intake of breath, as if she is the one sinking far beneath the waves and gasping for air, and it is his paw she is reaching for.

Her blue paw, damp from the water, reaches forward to clasp atop of his pale one. An explosion in her own chest, her heart beating rapidly beyond repair. A haze in her mind, clouded by the excitement she feels as she agrees.

"I'd like that," she tells him. Her honesty comes in swaths of honey and silk, though still pitched like a young girl's voice normally is. She almost squeals with her excitement, her tone unregulated, unleveled. "I - You..." she wants to say more, so much more, but she simply smiles instead, "I have so much to talk with you about." Conversations to pad out the evenings, promises and secrets and aspirations. Friends they are now - by complete circumstance and unyielding yearning. Childish they are, running face first into something neither of them truly understand. Happy, still, as they seek out a routine to live out this doomed fantasy. "Find me here in two sunsets?"

 

[ASTERPAW]

x

She's perfect and whole, her blood isn't riddled with another clans, and she's radiant as the sun whereas he is torn in half by blood and presents himself differently each night like the moon. Two complete opposites that dance around one another as they take turns to lift into the sky while the other admires the other rise and cast their light onto the world. There's no Riverclan, there's no Thunderclan... it is only them. Once more, he finds himself wishing that the borders didn't exist and its a foolish desire especially when Lavenderpaw's still a stranger to him in a sense yet its a risk that he'd be willing to take even if he risks drowning once more.

She confesses that she had found the seaglass and had thought of him, he can only feel his face growing warm and his smile doesn't falter in the slightest instead, he feels as if his face aches from how much Lavenderpaw has made him smile tonight. "Y-you thought of m-me?" A sniffle is heard noting that the night has become more chilly with the changing of seasons but he would risk any illness if it meant that he could have a moment longer of the slate-gray molly's time and he shuffles his paws timidly as he decides to confess as well "I thought of you when I got the b-butterfly wings." To think of someone outside of Thunderclan, ha, it almost feels like a sin though he doesn't find it in himself to care enough.

"I searched... and searched until I saw them... You're so radiant and I-I wanted to get you something that f-fit... that y-you liked." He knows that when the sunlight touched those wings they would shine underneath the sun's rays and make it look as if Lavenderpaw carried the horizon behind her ears. "I-I hope you like them..." He adds on timidly, Asterpaw holds his breath momentarily as he hopes that she likes the gift that he had delicately picked for her.

When her paw meets his own, he feels as if electricity runs up his limb and his heart races within his chest, the chocolate tabby glancing down at their paws then focuses his gaze onto her. He's surprised that she says she'd like for them to meet again and the older apprentice finds himself speechless in that moment. "I have so much to talk with you about." Her words slip out and his heart flutters within his chest, his stomach tossing and turning, and he parts his jaws to speak "Then my ears are yours... I'll heed every word a-and listen."

"Find me here in two sunsets?"

That's not soon enough. He almost wishes to plead to her but he knows that if they met up any sooner then their clans would grow suspicious of them and he'd rather Lavenderpaw not get in trouble because of him. His other ivory paw slips forward to hold her paw in his own with his gaze unwavering and as steady as they'll ever be, he speaks with a soft sniffle "Yes... yes, I'll m-meet you in two sunsets." There's a flash of brief sadness in his earthy toned eyes, "It's silly to be sad k-knowing that we'll meet again... I just wish that we didn't live in t-two different clans." He prays to Starclan for him not to end up like either of his parents, he couldn't bear such a fate and he knows that it'd break his heart.

CITY OF STARS; ARE YOU SHINING JUST FOR ME?

ASTERPAW

THUNDERCLAN APPRENTICE
TRANS MASC x HE/HIM/THEY/THEM​

x

"speech", thoughts, attacking
a runty, longhaired chocolate tabby with clay toned eyes and low white. a sickly apprentice with small patches of fevercoat left over in his pelt, kitten fuzz, and fat that clings to him but is fading away to give way to a taller/more lanky build
sickly child of juniperstar and sablestar; littermate of dreampaw and magpiepaw; padding after lavenderpaw

asterpaw's an introverted apprentice that keeps to himself for the most part unless family's involved, he usually keeps his head low and eyes averted so he doesn't make direct eye contact. once, he actually gets to know someone is he more open towards them and can prove to be a devoted friend. once he's comfortable around other individuals, he tends to speak a lot more and sometimes over shares about himself without realizing it. he hates that he was born sickly but despite it, he tries to overcome it and pushes himself harder than any of the apprentices

 

[lavenderpaw]

She isn't sure when the longing started. Were their paths always written in the stars? Or, maybe, it was when she was a foolish apprentice requesting rotting tails at the border. His face had been younger then - rounder, puffed with kitten fluff and shades of fading gray. She finds that she looks at him, that remnant of a rough kithood has all but left him. And though the chill of the night threatens his lungs, his build bulks out, a threat to the surrounding undergrowth. She wonders how much she's changed in his eyes - does he still see the foolishness in her? After all, Lavenderpaw has willingly crossed the river for him not just once, but twice. She could've lost her life saving him. Maybe that's where it started - their souls intertwined in the moments between.

He expresses a similar sentiment - yet his is far more purposeful. Whereas the river guided the seaglass to her, Asterpaw sought out the small being that these wings once belonged to. He thought of the way her fur curls around her frame, the shimmer of silver beneath the slate gray, and made an active decision to accent it with the monarch's design. She almost feels pitiful by comparison. Yet he holds her haphazard weaving - no doubt to be fixed and corrected in his free time - and happenstance seaglass in the same regard as he holds the wings. The mere fact that they thought of one another astonishes him into near silence. Her, entirely so.

"I do - I do!" Lavenderpaw says finally, suddenly, her voice only clipped by the eagerness to swipe away whatever uncertainty begs to plague him. "I've not been given anything yet, not by any tom or molly that's not my kin, at least. It's..." Nice? Sweet? Can she describe insect limbs as the warm feeling brought to her heart or the intense fluttering in her stomach? At what point does a feeling become so abstract that she can only hope that he understands, because he is feeling it, too? Her tail lingers in the low tide, swaying loosely in the water, "I like it, Asterpaw. Thank you," she repeats the gratitude like a shared mantra that she will continue to return to him. As if it's a game of trade, as if she is back to her own kitten fluff and pudgey belly, demanding that he share from across the river.

His words next make everything about her rise in warmth. She knows now why her mothers stayed by the oceanside. For if they even had a fraction of this infatuation with one another, they must've had to crash into the depths to cool off. She has half the mind to do so right now. Instead, however, Lavenderpaw purrs a giggle of sorts, deciding it best to not entertain that part of the conversation further. They would go in circles, she fears. The sun would rise and they would've long forgotten about their Clans.

... Their Clans. He agrees to the timeline, and though her heart is giddy his gaze flutters with a brief sorrow. And then he says it - "I just wish we didn't live in two different Clans." It's almost immediate, the suggestion that he move, then. This is one of the first conversations that she's had with the tom - a real one, with honesty and openness - and she's ready to heave him across the river at the soonest convenience. Lavenderpaw lets the vague tenseness in her shoulders fade as she smiles, "It'll fly by..." She hopes, at least. Or perhaps the next two days will be dreadfully impatient and slow. But even if they are, it'll make the encounter that much more wanted. "Maybe, one day, things can change," she offers as a sort of offering, looking down towards her held paw, blue between two swaths of ivory. "But this is nice for now, isn't it?" As much as she wants that change today, she doesn't know how much he would be leaving behind - and if he was to make the request, she doesn't think she could. Her mothers and father, her far too many siblings, her friends... Could she trade them all... for him?

Her mouth feels dry at the morsel of a thought. However, she still smiles. "Two sunsets. I promise."