Russetfall... Even though she carried herself as unfazed towards the others, he knew better. She was worried and perhaps blamed herself. Nudging Iciclepaw along was her way of escaping from the group, to collect her thoughts. Truth be told he was going to seek her out much sooner, but Jinglemoon and Wavesong were restless. They refused to let him out of sight, even though he was more than fine. All that remained were the scars that Adderfang had left him along with the ache of his joints. However, he was grateful for their concern. Their presence soothed him slightly as the image of Adderfang's raised bloodied claw before it struck kept replaying over and over again. When he trembled they asked if he was in pain, but he would shake his head. Oh, how it crushed him to see Wavesong's guilt ridden face. As for Jinglemoon? The sorrow haunted him.
Pikestar attempted to sleep, but he kept waking up in a panic. The events that transpired at the gathering refused to settle for the night. It was going so well at first too. He could remember the Thunderclan apprentice approaching him and how the two chatted. Then, he recalled Dustystar appearing and the two having a pleasant chat. Oh, everything was going well. He even chatted with Juniperstar for a bit about hosting some event between both their clans, before a bloodied Skyclan arrived. Was that a sign? Was I supposed to leave with Riverclan? After that... That's when I spoke with that Shadowclanner. The conversation with Coalstrike hadn't been a friendly one, and yet Adderfang decided to shove him away. From there... Everything went wrong. No matter what answer he gave the former Riverclan life guard, Adderfang was unsatisfied. It was the lack of satisfaction and fierce love that drove Adderfang to do what he did.
I can't stop thinking about him being so... So ruthless. We used to be friends. I think. He taught me how to fight moons ago. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't care a little, and if he didn't think we were friends. We even laughed together sometimes, so why? Why did he seem so okay? With doing that to me? Or was I wrong? Like always. Always making mistakes.
There was no use in trying to sleep again when he kept seeing Adderfang as soon as he closed his eyes. With a sigh he raises to his paws and begins to leave the medicine cat den. Before he leaves, he gives a final glance towards Jinglemoon and Wavesong sleeping soundly.
His first order of business was to find Russetfall. The first stop was the warriors den. Most warriors are resting in their nests while others glance towards him for only a moment before returning their attention to the exit of the den. The events from earlier are weighing on their minds without a doubt. He wishes to soothe them, but it would fall on deaf ears. They were processing what transpired and all he could do was wait. Unfortunately, the she-cat he was looking for was nowhere to be found. Without a word he leaves the warriors den and heads to his own. Guess I should clean a little to tire myself out. Maybe then I'll fall asleep.
What greets him is Russetfall lingering close to his nest.
A silver paw rubs against his neck, one now bearing claw marks.

Pikestar attempted to sleep, but he kept waking up in a panic. The events that transpired at the gathering refused to settle for the night. It was going so well at first too. He could remember the Thunderclan apprentice approaching him and how the two chatted. Then, he recalled Dustystar appearing and the two having a pleasant chat. Oh, everything was going well. He even chatted with Juniperstar for a bit about hosting some event between both their clans, before a bloodied Skyclan arrived. Was that a sign? Was I supposed to leave with Riverclan? After that... That's when I spoke with that Shadowclanner. The conversation with Coalstrike hadn't been a friendly one, and yet Adderfang decided to shove him away. From there... Everything went wrong. No matter what answer he gave the former Riverclan life guard, Adderfang was unsatisfied. It was the lack of satisfaction and fierce love that drove Adderfang to do what he did.
I can't stop thinking about him being so... So ruthless. We used to be friends. I think. He taught me how to fight moons ago. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't care a little, and if he didn't think we were friends. We even laughed together sometimes, so why? Why did he seem so okay? With doing that to me? Or was I wrong? Like always. Always making mistakes.
There was no use in trying to sleep again when he kept seeing Adderfang as soon as he closed his eyes. With a sigh he raises to his paws and begins to leave the medicine cat den. Before he leaves, he gives a final glance towards Jinglemoon and Wavesong sleeping soundly.
His first order of business was to find Russetfall. The first stop was the warriors den. Most warriors are resting in their nests while others glance towards him for only a moment before returning their attention to the exit of the den. The events from earlier are weighing on their minds without a doubt. He wishes to soothe them, but it would fall on deaf ears. They were processing what transpired and all he could do was wait. Unfortunately, the she-cat he was looking for was nowhere to be found. Without a word he leaves the warriors den and heads to his own. Guess I should clean a little to tire myself out. Maybe then I'll fall asleep.
What greets him is Russetfall lingering close to his nest.
"Oh. You're here?"
She looks awful, but he so does he. "Can't sleep either?"
The answer is obvious. She had even said so earlier, when she departed with Iciclepaw. The very apprentice who called him a father before his first death. Was he a bad father? For not seeing his child as soon as he could? Thinking of such things would only worsen his mood. What do I need to think of now. Green eyes linger on the she-cat in front of him. Her. Duh. But what should I say?"I didn't mean to make you worry."
Okay. Not the way he wanted to start off, but it was already out there. How can I save this? "Sorry. No. Actually I'm not. Sorry. I know you care. Deep down, even if you try to hide it."
Evidently, the lack of sleep and the whole ordeal of the gathering was taking a toll on his decision making. If he actually slept a little, he would've been a little wiser when conversing with her. "It's not like I didn't want to tell you about my nine... Eight lives. There were more important things to do and the council was a mess. I just thought it wasn't the right time to bring it up. Of course, learning by Adderfang's... Actions wasn't the best I'll admit."
He was rambling wasn't he? A silver paw rubs against his neck, one now bearing claw marks.
"You shouldn't blame yourself. You did everything you could. If it wasn't for you, I would've been an idiot. Talking to Adder I mean. And... I'm still here, so it's not too bad."

- @Russetfall This takes place a little later from their return to the clan after the gathering events.
-
PIKESTAR— leader of riverclan, former shipyard cat
♱ 40 moons — he/him — ages realistically on the 1st — mentoring iciclepaw
♱ speech is"#36D9AB"— thoughts are italics — attacks are underlined
♱ short haired silver mackerel tabby with green eyes
♱ peaceful & healing powerplay permitted — underline & tag when attacking
♱ penned by velou — kasaven on discord — open to plots & dms